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What to do the next time you have to make an important decision…

If I could go back in time, I would listen to my intuition more instead of allowing other people and their issues, drama, and priorities to negatively influence my choices. Even though I have learned to trust my intuition over the years, there are still times when I wish I had paid more attention to what my inner voice of wisdom was trying to warn me about before making decisions that affect my life, business, happiness, and peace of mind.

Think of your intuition as a gut feeling, instinct, hunch, or the voice of your best self.  Unfortunately, women and girls often ignore our intuition and allow outside influences to take us off course and interfere with our happiness and well-being.  Ignoring your feelings and inner wisdom can take you away from your goals and desires and lead to disappointment, pain, heartache, and drama. Sometimes we ignore our intuition or try to shut it down because we don’t have a logical explanation for it.

Instead, you can tap into the power of your intuition and use it as your own internal compass or GPS navigation system to guide you in the direction of your best self.  If something rubs you the wrong way about a person or a situation, pay attention to your internal warning signals instead of other people’s opinions about how you should feel or what you should do.

Here’s an example:

Aisha was really flattered when a cute guy named Damon asked her to go with him to a Homecoming party, but she got a weird feeling in her stomach about it, even though he drove a nice car and was really popular at school.  She told her best friend Kim that she wasn’t going to accept his invitation, but she changed her mind after Kim insisted that Damon was the greatest thing since the iPhone and told her that she could be missing out on a great boyfriend if she didn’t go out with him.  Aisha brushed off the weird feeling and spent her entire paycheck on a new outfit and boots.  She went to the party with Damon and he turned out to be a self-absorbed jerk who ended up making out with another girl at the party and leaving her stranded.

Aisha decided to catch a ride home with her friend Ryan, even though she smelled like weed and Hennessy and could barely stand up.  Aisha felt uncomfortable about it, but she got into her car anyway because she didn’t have enough money to catch a taxi and her feet hurt too bad to walk home in her new boots. To make matters worse, they got pulled over by the cops and Aisha was arrested even though she had never smoked marijuana a day in her life.

As Aisha spend the night in jail, she was heated and stressed out about possibly losing her scholarship when her school found out about the incident.  As far as she was concerned, it was Kim’s fault that she caught a case because she was the one who had pressured her into calling Damon. She couldn’t wait to get out of jail so she could go off on Kim.  It was too painful for Aisha to face the truth that she could have avoided the situation altogether if she had just listened to that inner voice that told her not to go out with Damon and the uncomfortable feeling that warned her not to get into the car with Ryan.

It can be hard to hear our wisdom when we are caught up in the excitement of a situation or distracted by our thoughts or other people’s opinions and expectations.

When was the last time you listened to your intuition?

The next time you are faced with an important decision, be still and listen to what your inner guidance is trying to tell you.

Honoring this special gift that we all have is an important step towards making healthy choices that are guided by self-love instead of fear, self-hate, and self-sabotage.

Affirmation:

“I honor and trust the voice of wisdom and guidance inside of me”

All my best,

Dr. Carla

PS: As I write my upcoming book, I will be sharing tips, advice, and inspiration to empower young women and girls to be their best selves. Let me know if there’s a topic, challenge, or issue that you want me to address for you or a friend in my book or blog.

 

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About Dr. Carla

Dr. Carla Stokes, PhD, MPH, is an adolescent health and behavior expert, professional keynote speaker, and women’s and girls’ health advocate. As a certified personal development coach and founder of Teen Girl University™, she helps young women and girls growing up in the digital age make healthy choices, strengthen social-emotional intelligence, and develop their leadership potential so they can thrive during adolescence and beyond. As a certified money breakthrough business coach and the founder of the A Heart for Girls™ Business Academy, she helps women with a heart for empowering girls build sustainable speaking and coaching businesses so they can monetize their work and have a bigger impact. For 15 years, Dr. Carla also served as the founder and former Executive Director of Helping Our Teen Girls In Real Life Situations, Inc. (HOTGIRLS)®, an award-winning 501(c)(3) nonprofit organization dedicated to improving the health and lives of underserved Black young women and girls. Her groundbreaking research and work with girls has been published in academic books and journals, studied in university courses, and featured in respected media outlets, including The New York Times, NBC, CBS, Fox, Fast Company, Yahoo! Parenting, Reuters, Woman's Day, and Ebony.

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Comments

  1. Traci Burton says

    Hi, Dr. Carla I just want to let you know how much this article truly inspired me and how you as a girl’s advocate inspire me. One day I hope to be just as awesome as you are. I think I’m already on the right path but as a teenager sometimes we don’t follow that inner voice of ours. Anywho, thanks so much for being who you are and know that none of your efforts are in vein. You are impacting lives all over the world. I first heard about you when I lived in Michigan and last June my family moved to metro Atlanta….I was so very excited to be apart of any of your programs or hear you speak….I haven’t been able to yet but I look forward to it….If you can please let me know when you are speaking or having a summmit….I would absolutely love it! Peace and Blessings to you….:)
    -Traci

  2. Dr. Carla says

    Hi Traci! Thanks for your comment. It really made my day and I’m glad to hear that you like my blog 🙂 Please follow me on Facebook and sign up for my email newsletter so you can get more tips and updates about when I am speaking or hosting events/programs in Atlanta. I’m taking some time to finish a book for girls, but I’m planning to offer something new this summer and I’d love to see you there. Best wishes!

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